In case you’ve missed all the free advertising the TV news has given the Powerball Lottery the past week, let me get you up to date. ComeSaturday night some lucky bastard will walk away with more than $800 million should he pick the right six numbers.
Pretty exciting news huh? Who wouldn’t be jacked about becoming a near billionaire overnight?
Before you get carried away with dreams of buying a big yacht that you have no idea how to navigate or informing your boss that you have always hated her and will not be returning to your cubicle, let’s think this thing over.
First of all your chances are awful. If one shot in 292 million gives you any hope at all, you are the biggest optimist on earth or more likely untrained in mathematics.
You are more likely be killed by a jealous Tom Brady after somehow managing to have sex with his supermodel wife than you are to hit all six numbers on the Powerball.
How do you think this lottery jackpot got so big afterall? It keeps rolling over week after week because nobody wins the top prize. Sure there are other winners along the way with a few folks even winning a million dollars by matching five numbers.
But with gamblers from 44 of 50 states plus Washington, D.C., Puerto Rico and the U.S. Virgin Islands trying to hit it big on Powerball, you would think someone would have gotten lucky weeks ago when the jackpot was just $50 or $60 million.
A conspiracy theorist would claim the lottery is rigged. Even with the odds so stacked against the gamblers buying $2 tickets you would think winners would come more frequently.
With the lottery getting so much attention due to the giant Powerball jackpot it got me to thinking how all this publicity is similar to daily fantasy sports.
Here’s a breakdown image to also show you how much money you’ll actually get after the government (federal & state) grabs their stake in you and what you can buy after that. It’s about $309 million left if you take the lump sum. Frankly, I would actually go with the 30-year payout since you’ll be getting about $29 million a year which would seem pretty good for most people…even a Kardashian. But that’s just me as history shows, most people who take the lump sum wind up blowing it all within 5 to 10 years. Also, most people don’t realize that that money is held in bonds which, on average, still give you a present day value each year.
Here’s a quick top ten to compare daily fantasy and the Powerball lottery, both of which could make you rich over the weekend.
10. Get back to reality for a second. You’re much more likely to earn big money by starting a small business than by either form of gambling. That is if you have any smarts at all and if you are taking the time to actually read then you are already a cut above the rest of the herd watching cat videos.
9. If you’re clueless about fantasy sports, at least you can follow what the experts do with their NFL or NBA lineups. You won’t get much help from “Junebug” who saw his 2014 winning numbers in a Vodka induced daydream.
8. Worried about the CEOs of DraftKings and FanDuel making millions off of mostly ignorant users? Lottery reps make pretty good money as well. The president of Georgia’s lottery makes a cool $300,000 a year.
7. Take a look around at the folks buying Powerball tickets and compare them to the average daily fantasy sports player. Who do you think can most afford to be gambling, the guy cashing a social security check at the beer store or the nerd on FanDuel with a full-time job?
6. If you win the $800 million dollars, just know it will only net you about $500 million. Funny how the government wins even when you win.
5. You may meet some real pricks in head to head NBA fantasy contests online, but they will be nothing compared to the jerks at Quiktrip holding the lottery line up as they dig out $2 in nickels.
4. There is no strategy that will help you win the Powerball. You have two options: Pick your own numbers or let the machine “quick pick” your numbers. At least with DFS, you can try different tactics to win. In other words, one of these two forms of gambling involves using your brain.
3. A big complaint about DraftKings and FanDuel were the onslaught of commercials when the NFL season started in 2015. I’d love to hear these complainers’ thoughts on all the free airtime that local and national TV news has given the government run Powerball.
I get it. It’s a lot of money and it is news, but day after day of these reports has gotten old. Give me more hilarious guys like this or stop asking boring people what they would do with all that money.
2. Think you’re helping the education system even if you don’t win the lottery? Think again and do a little research on how pitiful U.S. public schools have become. You’re better off to play on Fantasy Hub where you can pick your own charity as you play.
1. You are unlikely to get rich with either the Powerball lotto or daily fantasy sports this weekend. However, you can decide for yourself if you would have more fun buying a random set of numbers at a filthy gas station or getting involved with real competition in fantasy leagues from the comfort of your own home.
You can’t win $800 million on DraftKings, but a million is possible, and I guarantee you will have more fun along the way.