In a world full of hate, violence, and struggle, why can’t more people use their celebrity for good? Why do the people, who are seemingly entitled and f**cked up, have a platform by which they exploit folks who are just trying to live their lives? These are the things I ponder.
Recently, the world got a taste of just how dumb, lousy and childish people can be. Dani Mathers, a woman who clearly prides herself on how she looks, did a deplorable thing and posted a SnapChat video of an unsuspecting naked woman in a gym locker room with the caption, “If I can’t unsee this, then you can’t either.” She received a lot of backlash and reportedly lost her job at a radio station in Los Angeles. She is also banned, for life, from all L.A. Fitness clubs. But her behavior and lack of judgment are so damaging that those actions aren’t enough.
This young woman, who is the 2015 Playmate of the year, body shammed another woman and therein lies my greatest issue. She has fed into the horrible notion of what the ideal body type is and manifested her thought process in the most disgraceful way. She should be ashamed of herself. She should be embarrassed, and she should never be able to live this down.
Now Mathers claims, in another SnapChat video, that she posted it on “accident.” Apparently, it was meant for a friend, but because she is “new to SnapChat,” her lack of understanding in how the app works is what led to the public shaming. She clarified that “She loves the female body and knows that body shaming is wrong.” Her apology is bullshit. I get that you have conversations with friends via apps and texts, but to take a picture of a woman, naked without her knowing and with the intention of making fun of her is disgusting. Mathers would have been better off just saying I was mistaken, and I’m sorry, instead of trying to explain away what she meant to do. She admitted that she was making fun of the woman; she just didn’t mean to do it publicly. That is still VERY wrong.
If anyone on this earth understands the harshness of not fitting a particular mold, a woman does. Because of that, Mathers should not have looked at the poor lady with repulse but with compassion, understanding, and respect. In fact, she should not have looked at her at all. It’s hard as hell to be a woman!
Social media is a bitch. In the quest to go viral, get followers and do shocking things to get attention, people sometimes lose their sense of what’s right and wrong. This situation is the perfect example. Mathers thought it cute, funny and lighthearted to secretly take a photo of this woman and ended up publicly ridiculing her in front of the whole world. That image has been shared time and time again. We have to remember that what we do and what we put on the Internet will always be there. We can’t undo it, even if we delete it. Once a thing is posted, it runs the risk of blowing up into something that turns innocent people into victims, making them the butt of hurtful jokes and memes. It’s not okay.
I feel not one ounce of empathy for Dani Mathers. She and people like her have to learn that things aren’t always about them and in life, you reap the consequences of your horrible actions. This was not just an innocent mistake on her part. I say it’s good that she is banned from the gyms. Good that what she did was reported to the cops and good that she runs the risk of being investigated by the LAPD for the “illegal distribution” of an image. Good!
This whole situation speaks to one of the bigger problems we face in this country, and that is body shaming. All of us are guilty of doing it at some point in time. Whether we see someone and have an unpleasant thought or we look at ourselves in the mirror and wish for a different physique. I think that most people naturally lean towards a judgmental perspective when it comes to body image because that is how our minds have been wired since youth. Our need to be aesthetically pleasing in society’s eyes is also one of the ways we are controlled because damn it if we don’t look the part, we need to do whatever we can in order to play the sick game.
Women, let us look at each other with love. Between men and the media (which is run by men) badmouthing and criticizing us, we have to encourage other women and let them know that they are enough. Let us realize that we are all fighting a battle that tears away at the fabric of our souls. Not everyone recovers.
Dani Mathers is getting a harsh lesson and it’s one where we all can learn a little something about being a better human being.