With 3 NFL games on tap for 2016’s version of Thanksgiving, there’s a lot to watch for with just a few weeks left in the NFL season. If you can avoid being distracted by gallons of sweet tea, a giant bird carcass on your table, and something called “giblet gravy,” the NFL has a lot in store on the fattest Thursday of the year.
Back in the day, I had maybe one game to choose from on Thanksgiving. If there were two, our crappy antenna wouldn’t pick the other up. No cable until 1993 SON!
And you thought you had it tough coming up as a kid.
But I survived my youth to make it to a modern NFL, where I can enjoy not one, not two, but three games on Turkey Day.
Football fans have it so easy nowadays.
So to make sure you are truly thankful for the bountiful NFL action on Thursday, don’t miss the key storylines for tomorrow.
7. I’ve witnessed some horrific quarterback play over the years on Thanksgiving. Some as bad as the flimsy paper plates my family members tried to force on our tribe during feasts. Use sturdy paper plates people. Or better yet, use an edible plate if you can find them, like an ice cream cone but for yams and mashed taters.
Where was I?…oh yes. Horrible quarterbacks that ruin T-Day. Look for Sam Bradford to file charges in the city of Detroit after this game. If you don’t know Sam, you should throw the ball away after like 3 seconds if no one is open. Look for Bradford to try to talk his coach into punting on 3rd downs after he takes his 7th sack of the game.
6. Andrew Luck is concussed and will probably miss Thursday’s game with Pittsburgh. Back in the day, quarterbacks would not miss a beat after getting that bell rung in their dome. Same with Thanksgiving get-togethers. It was OK to let Uncle Joe get drunk and have a good time. But after years of destroyed property and fist-fights, rules had to change. So QBs have to be protected, and many Thanksgiving events have banned hard liquor.
So some games, and family gatherings are not as exciting as they once were. We are now stuck with backup quarterbacks and a boring, sober Uncle Joe.
5. After Thanksgiving weekend, there will be just 5 weeks of the regular season left. While that’s a blessing for Cleveland fans, most of us cringe at the thought of only having NBA action to entertain us in a few months.
Oh and Christmas is just 30 days away once Turkey Day wraps. Even more cringe-worthy for procrastinators.
4. Kirk Cousins has found his stride, and I hope he keeps it going. Washington didn’t trust him enough to sign him for a multi-year deal, so it could bite them in the ass. After all the money Dan Snyder has wasted on over-the-hill free agents of the past, it would be ironic for him to miss out on a worthwhile one that was in-house, because of a lack of belief.
3. With even less time left in fantasy leagues than in the real NFL season, it’s time to step up and call out the losers. No need to gloat over your season sweep of your boss in your Nutcracker League. Or text your buddy four times a day to ask how his season is going, when you know damn well that he has a single win!
However, the real losers are the guys who have quit on their fantasy teams. Leaving lineups void of active players. Not using the waiver wire, etc. By being babies, these guys are affecting the outcome of the regular season for guys who have not quit. Some undeserving fantasy owners will make the playoffs because “Gary Give-up” is no longer putting up a fight.
Publicly shame these players and kick them from your league. It’s an epidemic, and only you can prevent it from happening again in 2017.
2. Pittsburgh was a sexy pick to win the Super Bowl when the season started. Not the fav, but a good bet with nice odds. They were hot to start (4 – 1), then flipped the script in their next 5 games (1 – 4). Beating the Colts is mandatory if they are to climb back as a real threat to the Patriots and Denver in the AFC.
1. The Dak and Zeke show has been more inspiring than your grandma’s famous dressing. OK, I’m being generous to the Dallas rookies. Nobody comes into Granny’s house and runs roughshod over that delicious concoction of turkey juices and cornbread.
But these two young offensive warriors have made their mark on the NFL from early in the year. Ezekiel Elliot is what most thought he would be, a freaking beast. But Dak has been the surprise, and had Tony Romo not gotten hurt; we would have never seen Prescott’s ability this season.
We don’t know if we’ll still be awed by the Dallas duo after the New Year starts. But for now, they are the biggest story of the NFL season headed into Thanksgiving.